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Dandy Lawence

"On one of his spells in the ranks, Lawrence was assigned as batman to an officer of the class who used to be known in the War as 'temporary gentlemen.' Lawrence hated him at sight, and on the first evening, when he was unpacking his kit, looked round and said: 'I beg your pardon, sir, but I can only find one of your razors.' 'I've only got one razor.' 'Indeed, sir? I thought most gentlemen had a razor for every day in the week.' After a moment he looked round again. 'Sir, I can't find your left-handed nail-scissors. 'The poor man rushed out of the tent and applied for a less exacting batman."
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