"Don't mess with Joan Rivers," the San Francisco Examiner advised in 2003. "She'll take your eye out. The bigmouth mother of celebrity-for-no-good-reason Melissa Rivers blew up when a clerk in a busy rental car agency in Manhattan made her wait too long. She yelled, 'Don't you know who the f--- I am, you stupid bitch?' and tossed a pen at the poor woman, striking her in the eye."
[Rivers once registered her famous line -- "Can we talk?" -- as an official trademark.]