"You see, I was working in the motor pool. That's where they keep trucks and jeeps and vehicles like that. The phone rings. The sign said, 'Recruits, do not answer phone.' I didn't know what's a recruit, so I said hello.
"A voice said, 'Soldier, what vehicles have you got available?' I said, 'Six trucks, seven jeeps, an MA armored car, a half-track, and Fat Ass Johnson's command car.'
"He said, 'Have you any idea who you're talking to?' I said, 'No, sir.' He said, 'This is Colonel Johnson!'
"I said, 'Colonel, do you have any idea who you're talking to?' He said, 'No.' I said, 'Bye-bye, Fat Ass!'"
[In 1829 the famous Tripp sisters weighed 124 and 205 pounds, respectively; they were three and five years old.]