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Robbie Coltrane & the Eton Of Scotland

"After a primary education at a local state school,

[Robbie Coltrane] had been sent to the Glenalmond public school in Perthshire, known as The Eton Of Scotland. This place was deeply authoritarian, with bullying and disciplinary beatings commonplace. Due to this unhappy experience, Robbie would later call for all public schools to be banned and swear he'd never send his son to one, 'Not unless I hate him.'

"But, while there, Fat Rab (as he was then called -- friends say he named himself) used comedy and natural ebullience to get him through. He was immensely popular with the other kids. He once hung the prefects' gowns from the school's clock-tower..."

[Young Coltrane also joined the so-called Curry Boys -- a minor cult whose new members were required to kiss the maggot-infested head of a crow.]

[Robbie Coltrane made his stage debut at the age of 12, delivering charged rants from Henry V while wrapped in chain mail.]

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