Nubar Gulbenkian, one of the world's wealthiest men, arrived home one day with a wonderful new vehicle. "It has disk brakes, whatever they are," he proudly declared. "It has automatic transmission, whatever that is. It has power steering, whatever that is. And it can turn on a sixpence, whatever that is."

[Gulbenkian was so desperate to see his obituary in print that he once tried to bribe the Times to print it, a fact alluded to at length in his eventual notice.]