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Dane Cook Heckler

"I got in a fight during [a show]," Dane Cook once recalled. "I was in Nashville and this guy, who was hammered, thought I was saying shit to his girl, when I was talking to the people behind him. He started getting belligerent and yelled, 'Just do your show!' I go, 'I'm not even talking to you, dummy! You know, people exist behind you.' I don't know why that set him off. Maybe it was the concept that 'people exist.' 'Exist' got him. EX-IST! A split second later this guy is onstage kicking me, punching me in the head and ripping off my shirt. It was Thunderdome for a minute, and nobody would help. I had the mic in my hand, and all that's going through my head is 'Don't get beat up in front of 250 people.' I hit him with the mic on the side of the face and got feedback like BROOMMM! Finally people came up, ripped him off, and I stood up and was like, 'So, anyway, what else? Ah... I'm gonna go faint.'"

["One of the best heckles I got was in Boston, where a guy said, 'You better be funny, or I'll punch you in the face.' He said it so casually. I thought, Yeah, that'll keep me going..."]

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