"Absolutely -- I loved every one of them," he replied. "People say, 'How can you be married eight times?' But I played the hand dealt me the way I was supposed to. I was friendly with most of my ex-wives. My God, there's a Mickey Rooney's Former Wives Marching Band!"
["When I say I do," Rooney once quipped, "the Justice of the Peace replies, 'I know, I know.' I'm the only man in the world whose marriage license reads, 'To Whom it May Concern.'"]
["Had I been brighter, the ladies been gentler, the Scotch weaker, the gods kinder, the dice hotter," Rooney once declared, "it might have all ended up in a one-sentence story."]